My heart has felt heavy this past week.  I have been reading so many different thoughts, articles, and reviews of the movie 50 Shades of Grey.  Secretly, I had hoped it would flop at the box office, sadly it was a box office win.  I am sad that so many people are so drawn to a hurtful and harmful “pseudo love” in light of what God has designed our experience of love to be.

1 Corinthians 13 says it best”  Love is patient and kind (is not demanding nor abrupt); Love does not envy or boast ( is not prideful about a conquest); is not arrogant or rude (not manipulating and intimidating).

It does not insist on it own way (does not take affection “my way, my timing, my satisfaction”); is not irritable or resentful ( does not confuse anger and harshness with affection); it does not rejoice in wrongdoing ( does not feel empowered by breaking barriers and twisting what real love looks like) , but rejoices in the truth.

Love bears all things ( considers the needs of the one they love to be their utmost joy), believes all things ( does not establish a relationship of uncertainty and tension), hopes all things and endures all things.

People often say “what happens in the bedroom is up to each individual marriage and I would agree…to a point.  This movie gathers millions of people into a room to watch harsh, intimidating, and borderline abusive sexuality with the redemption at the end because the arrogant, narcissistic billionaire finally “falls in love”.  All wrapped up in a pretty bow! No!  What really happens is that the stage has been set for people to have their sensitivities and values worn down once again; moving hearts further and further away from the beautiful plan God had for love.

This has made me so sad.

This morning I had the refreshing joy of reading a blog by Lisa Jacobson (www.club31women) where she so beautifully listed “what makes love hot”:

1.  Love is hot when a man and women commit to stay together.

2.  Love is hot when he and she freely offer forgiveness to one another.

3.  Love is hot when he cherishes her and she respects him.

4.  Love is hot when he and she lovingly lay down their lives for each other.

5.  Love is hot when a  couple is so grateful to grow old together.

I look at my precious, innocent granddaughters face and I pray that she will experience a rich and meaningful marriage relationship full of fun, passion, and rich love completely devoid of anger, abuse, manipulation, or cruelty!

Last week I had a sweet visit with my precious mother; she and my father have been married for over 60 years!  ” How’s dad?” I asked and she said with a sparkle in her eye and a knowing smile of her face ” he’s so cute, he’s sexy”. 🙂  we giggled.

THAT is what God intended..deep,rich love and affection that stands the test of time…don’t settle for any counterfit expressions of love!  God had the right idea!! 🙂