As a Life Coach I have the privilege of having crucial conversations with the most amazing women! I love it when they say ” I never thought of that!” or “Boy, that’s a really good question!” Those statements let me know that they are gaining some fresh thinking and may embark of some new ideas. Over the past 14 years, however, I have heard a statement that has caused me great concern. That statement? ” Dianna, I’m so glad I have you to talk to, I don’t have anyone else.” That statement creates so much sadness in my heart and I have often responded with the question “who are your people?” “who do you have in your posse?”
Relationships, especially those who we would invite into our “inner circle” will require purposeful attention. Trusted relationships are built over time and, if taken seriously, can also stand the test of time.
As a young pastors wife with a very outgoing personality, I spent many happy hours flitting around socially, connecting lightly, with practically every woman in the church. I felt like I needed to be willing to be everyone’s Buddy. Interestingly enough, when I faced my own challenges of marriage, parenting, and ministry, I didn’t really have solid, trusted friends to talk to. My mistake? I had built my relationships so that they would fall into 2 of the categories listed below ~ Acquaintances and Friends.
I had neglected to intentionally build my inner circle- my posse- my close friends.
Over the years I have met many more wonderful acquaintances and made lots of friends along the way, but I have worked hard to build a group of precious, deeply trusted relationships where I can find and give encouragement, direction, prayer support, and fun. It has taken time and intentionality.
What are the names of your people? Who sits in your inner circle? Can you list them? I have often made the statement ” we don’t need a whole bunch of people to count on, but we all need a few trusted friends to share life with.”
“A friend loves at all times, and a brother ( or sister) is born for a time of adversity” (Prov 17:17).