What if ?

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Last summer Greg and I had the pleasure of sneaking off to Kauai for a little break before jumping into a very busy Fall. The news prior had been fairly disconcerting as there were headlines expressing that the Hawaiian Islands were an easy target for North Korean Missiles!! Greg and I even shared that we had some reservations about going.

The evening we arrive in the Princeville area we unloaded our groceries and proceeded to make a nice dinner to each on the lanai as the darkness began to settle in.   Fifteen minutes into our meal we say what we thought was a very big and very bright “falling star”. We both remarked how strange it appeared………..Five minutes later there was a quiet but huge explosion in the sky with white sparks flooding the sky right in front of us. Greg and I sat there frozen! Was this our worse fear? What had just happened? I quickly looked up the local news and there was nothing to be found. Had we just seen a missile?

The following morning it was announced that one of our military carriers had accomplished a “practice run” to see how prepared we were for any incoming missile. Whew!

Two weeks ago it was wrongly announced that there was an incoming missile and those on the island needed to find somewhere to go. Panic ensued. For 35 minutes there was no announcement that the alarm was sent out by mistake; for 35 minutes people rushed to connect with loved ones, pray, get inside “safer” buildings, and feel all the anxiety that someone might experience after realizing this could be their last day. Wow!

I only felt a fraction of that anxiety when I watched a missile explode in front of us during dinner; the idea that this could be our last day has definitely spurred on meaningful conversation between Greg and I.

Faced with the possibility that we would not have another day we have looked at the breadth of our lives and have begun making adjustments that we could have regretted missing; people, relationship with God, places we want to see, impact we want to have. As scary as that experience was we have used it as a catalyst for fresh growth and stronger priorities.

What if you had been in Hawaii two weeks ago? (I had 8 friends on the island at the time!!) What if you felt like you had a second chance after it was announced that the alarm was sent out by mistake? What would you regret? What would you change? Would your priorities look a little different? I encourage you not to wait until you are in harms way; make those adjustments this year because truly, none of us know when our last day will come. Live with no regrets!

A Goal without a Plan is Just a Wish!

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Facebook added a “memories” feature this year where daily you can receive photos sharing exactly what you were doing on THIS day last year.  Today I was reminded that exactly one year ago I was taking some time to ponder my goals and dreams for 2016; I am jolted by how quickly this year has passed!

I had to ask myself the question, ” did I complete many of my goals and am I ending the year well?”  Hmmmmm………Yes, and no.   Company goals?  As a team I believe we exceeded our goals!  Friend and family relationships? I am confident that  I stayed true to my goals of keeping people a key priority in my schedule. In my faith?  I wonder if I will ever be truly satisfied with my yearly growth; there is always so much more to understand, so many areas to grow.  In my health?  Not my best account and one that I need to move up the priority list.  I’ve done a bit of the unthinkable……..allowed my schedule to affect my strict disciplines!  I know, I know……I can hear you saying “but you are a Coach!”  You are correct…..just trying to be authentic!

However, there are other questions I found valuable in assessing my year in preparation for a new year ahead and I thought I would pass them on to you for that when you access your year and set fresh goals for 2017:

  1.  Did I love my family well?
  2. Did I use my gifts and talents well?
  3. What were some of the notable blessings and memories from this year?
  4. Was there a particular book/teaching that caused me to grow this year?
  5. What goals didn’t get completed? What do I need to change to be successful?
  6. Was I a grateful person this year?
  7. What is one thing that went really well? did I celebrate it?
  8. Was I a gracious host this year? Did I practice hospitality?
  9. Was I kind to others who serve me in the community: grocery stores, gas, etc?
  10. What term would I use to describe this year?

Take some time, before the hustle and bustle of this wonderful holiday season, grab a journal, and consider how you spent this year.  Did you achieve your goals? Were you the kind of person you wanted to be?  What would you like the coming year to look like for you, your family, your company, and your community?  Then, make a plan, calendar dates and steps, and celebrate the wins along the way!  Time really passes quickly so it’s never too early to get started!

Remember, A Goal without a Plan is just a Wish!

 

 

 

 

The Answer is “NO”~~

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Do you have difficulty saying “no”?  Are you always trying to be nice to others at the expense of yourself? Well, you are not alone!!  Many of us are so afraid of disappointing others or making someone mad; we simply say “yes’!  “NO” just feels wrong!

There are so many reasons why we have a rough time saying “no”!  Here are just a few:

1.  We want to be helpful.

2.  We don’t want to be rude.

3.  We want to be agreeable.

4.  We are afraid of conflict.

5.  We don’t want others to feel rejected by us.

Do any of these reasons ring true for you? They do for me.  I hate thinking that my “No” would ever cause another person to feel I didn’t value those things that matter to them!

The real truth is that HOW you say “no” is where the real impact comes in. So, in order for you to have success in saying the needed “no”; here are a few sentences to consider!

a.  ” I cannot commit to this as I have other priorities at this time.”

b.  Now is simply not a good time as I am in the middle of something that demands my attention. Can we talk about it in 9- 12 weeks again?

c.   Let me pray about it and think about for a week or so, then I can get back to you with greater clarity.

d.  I don’t believe I am the best person for this.  How about talking to _________________?

e.  No, I simply cannot; I have other priorities that are eminent at this time.

I believe that by making clear statements about your ability to commit to a task or team, helps others to have the freedom to make wiser choices as well.

Saying ‘No” often takes courage!  It is so hard; we feel guilty and wonder what others will think of us! A great article in Psychology today says this so well; ” NO is a tool where we establish and maintain a distinct perimeter of ourselves.  No says, ” This is who I am, this is what I value, this is what I will choose to do and what I will not choose to do.  We are all committed to loving, giving, cooperating, and pleasing others.  But not at the expense of losing ourselves!”

Consider your on-going commitments today. Is there somewhere that you finally need to say “no”?  Are there great things for you to do but you are stuck doing  good things simply because you fear saying “no” to them to make room for that which is GREAT?   Ponder these thoughts and If “no” is needed; dive in! Say “no”…

God can raise up leaders in His own way so if you need to say NO for a season; He clearly understands!  He will give you wisdom and peace.

Ultimately–when we step into a situation we have little or no time for; we end up resenting the very things we have committed to and that is beyond painful.

say NO if you need to; blame Coach Dianna if you want to! 🙂